Dazed and confused? Not me. I’m just Lost in the Cheese Aisle.

Saturday, March 14, 2015


Summer Berry Pie
Summer berry pie... an appropriate way to celebrate Pi Day even if it isn’t quite spring yet.

Today is Pi Day, March 14, often rendered as 3.14 in American English. Coincidentally, it’s also the day on which Albert Einstein’s birthday is celebrated in his adopted home of Princeton, New Jersey. I guess that makes it a relatively significant holiday.

This year, Pi Day falls on 3.14.15, so we have a few more actual Pi Digits to play with. It’s the most pi-like Pi Day we’ll see for 100 years. Huzzah!

My friend Radio Richard reminds me that March 14 is also Steak and BJ Day. Celebrated exactly one month after Valentine’s Day, Steak and BJ Day serves as a male-centric counterpoint to the Holiday of Hearts and Flowers.  To wit:
Over the years, Valentine’s Day has become a commercial holiday for women. On February 14, intimate couples celebrate their love with candy, flowers, greeting cards, and other gifts of affection. Men do not want candy. Men have no need for flowers or teddy bears. There are two things men want: steak and a blow job.
These days, I’ll settle for a steak... especially because tomorrow is EATAPETA (Eat A Tasty Animal for PETA) Day.

In any event, to celebrate the occasion I am once again happy to trot out one of my favorite 100-word stories: Pie-Eyed Jeremy, originally posted in June 2006.  Enjoy.


Jeremy loved pie.

Jeremy loved pie with a white-hot passion.

No birthday cake for him. It had to be pie, only pie.

Dutch Apple. Mince. Blueberry. Rhubarb. Pumpkin. Coconut Custard. Steak and Kidney. Chicken Pot. If it was a pie, Jeremy would seek it out and devour it.

But pies were expensive. Fillings and crust cost money, which Jeremy had in short supply. Eventually, to support his pie habit, Jeremy turned to crime.

During a botched heist at Entenmann’s, two hostages died in a hail of bullets. Jeremy was arrested and convicted.

His last meal? Pie, of course. Cyanide pie.

No comments: