Dazed and confused? Not me. I’m just Lost in the Cheese Aisle.

Friday, July 29, 2011


After the Great Protein Shortage of 2029, the genetic engineers started getting creative.

People needed protein, and the existing sources weren’t getting the job done. Beef cattle were practically extinct after the BSE epidemics in the late teens. Fish were laden with heavy metals, poultry with pesticides. Legumes were fine - except for their unfortunate vaporous side effects.

But then a brilliant Belgian geneticist had a breakthrough. An excellent protein source: animals that lived in a farmable colony. Roughly three apples high, they made a perfect portion. And in time, people got used to the color.

Smurf and Turf, anyone?

[Originally published in January 2007 at Blog d’Elisson. I thought this story was especially apropos in view of today’s release of The Smurfs, Hollywood’s big-budget live-action fillum featuring the little blue buggers.]

No comments: