One day I went to the mountain climbers’ store,
’Cause I needed carabiners and a whole lot more.
Took my swag home and and stuck it in the drawer,
And then I didn’t think about it any more.
Then one day the Missus kicked me to the floor
And she told me to get my ass out the door.
Turns out there’s one thing that’ll make her sore -
It’s when you put the crampons in the tampon drawer.
It’s the kind of mistake that will cut you to the core -
Don’t ever put the crampons in the tampon drawer.
ANGRY WOMAN
ReplyDeleteShe gave me a lotta
vagina dentata
that day
her fang-cooter chewed me—
it totally blew me
away
I can always rely on the Big Hominid to out-Elisson Elisson.
ReplyDeleteOh, not at all, sir! I bow before your poetic skill! (Not to mention the fact that you seem able to produce verse pretty much on command-- a most enviable faculty-- whereas I have to wait for the Muse to strike. And she doesn't strike often, alas.)
ReplyDelete*sigh*
ReplyDeleteElisson, get the carabiner off your weiner, and the flex cam unwedged from your taint! That's not the kind of crack it's intended for!!
Levon? Where are you, Levon?
ReplyDelete@Rahel - You asked; I answered.
ReplyDelete